Dinah

There is one story from this time that deserves mention.

Shechem was a town that, like most places in those days, was named after the guy who ran it. Shechem was the son of Hamor, the king of the territory. Remember, this was a very tribal society; the places weren’t huge, maybe a couple of hundred people, but it was still significant who owned them and they called themselves kings and princes and so forth.

Well, when Shechem saw Jacob’s daughter, Dinah, he couldn’t help himself and, as what seems to be the custom, he raped her. When Dinah’s brothers found out, they were out for blood.

But, lo and behold, Shechem actually fell in love with Dinah and wanted to marry her. Shechem’s father came to Jacob and wanted to make a deal. He basically offered Jacob anything he wanted if he’d give Dinah to his son. And he sweetened the deal by offering up all his daughters to intermarry with Jacob’s sons so they could be one big happy family.

But Dinah’s brothers said they’d only agree if Hamor and all his clansmen got themselves circumcised. For some reason they all agreed. I don’t know, but I’m pretty sure I’d have to think about it real hard before I’d whack off the head of my pee pee just so I could get at some strange women. But apparently these women were pretty hot and the men were tired of marrying relatives. They also thought they’d eventually take Jacob for everything he had anyway so they went along with it.

Jacob’s sons had other ideas. On the third day, when the newly circumcised men could barely walk, Dinah’s brothers swooped into town and killed them all. They plundered the town, taking all the flocks and livestock along with all the women and children. It gives you an idea of the size of the place if eleven guys could do that much damage.¹

This was the first of what would eventually be many genocidal carnages perpetrated by the sons of Abraham.

Nonetheless, Jacob and his tribe were on the run once again. The word must have gotten out about these crazy band of killers because, as they headed west toward Bethel, all the other people in the area gave them a wide berth.